4 Months

Yup that's right it has been 4 months since my husband left and my grandpa passed. It is STILL so surreal. I HATE to say it but sometimes I forget. Not about  those 2 men but that they are gone and what its like to be with them. I forget what their hugs and kisses feel like. I forget what my grandpa's voice sounds like. I forget and I hate that I forget and I hate myself for forgetting 2 of the most important people. Somedays I just dont know how to feel. Like today I have been in bed sick all day its lonely and I hate it all I did was lay in bed and watch netflix in my underware and a tank top drinking mellow yellow and eating toast. Only a few more days to pack stuff up and move to WA. I cant wait maybe I'll feel better there maybe I'll find ME

Overwhelmed

So I havent written in a while. I am just so overwhelmed with all the moving stuff and Jon being gone. Jon and I got in a huge fight the other night well it was me yelling at him for him being a complete and total ass whole, but he is getting help and thats what is important. Im not really going to go into details on the internet about what happend but I was pretty darn close to wanting to leave him. On a brighter note I am moving to WA next week is my last week in NC for a while. I cant wait to move I hate being here alone. I am going to start looking for a job and working out. I wanna look good for when Jon comes home for R&R. Well thats all really... It snowed yesterday and that quickly turned to ice and it is still ice. OK Ill update more later

Christmas Time!!

Yesterday was a little frustrating!  Me and 3 close friends were going to go to this Christmas Parade and Festival but it was canceled so we went out to dinner then we were going to go to see the nutcracker! It was $10 a person and my friends have younger kids so  2 of them decided not to go but one stayed and her daughter is 4 and was not behaving I think she was too young to be at a ballet so even though I didnt get to watch much what I did see was wonderful they worked so hard. UGH anyway, I was kidnapped today lol so I didnt get much cleaning done but I had a lot of fun!! I am so looking forward to my trip back to CA it will be so much fun!!

A lonely Thanksgiving

SOOO I spent my thanksgiving a lone.... yup I was invited many places dont get me wrong but I was sick! TOTALLY SUCKS. So I was home alone sick on thanksgiving! And today I feel a little better but my throat is killing me. I didnt sleep with the AC on but I did sleep with the heater on and was crying because I felt sooo alone. oh well there is always next year and I did get to celebrate it in Tuesday. Oh well next week I am going shopping with my friend Ashleigh for christmas presents!!! I love it

Annoyed

SO what really ticks me off is that my husband thinks because he makes the money he gets to spend it all... I mean yeah he does make all the money and I dont have a job at the moment but I live in the house too I cook every meal I clean and do all his laundry so he has a uniform to wear to work. I mean we are married after all. GRR men. Oh and sometimes I hate what a nice person I am people think they can take advantage if Tris because she wont stand up for her self well NO MORE. I let my friends walk all over me though most dont. I babysit and dont ask for money even though they know I need it grr. OH and what is with people writing their facebook myspace and twitter statuses to famous people do they really think famous people read that shit I HIGHLY doubt it and if they do they could give 2 shits what you think. I love being an army wife and am DAMN PROUD but shit my husband is married to the army and Im the bitch on the side, I hate it but oh well at least he isn't a convict you know they have convicts wives groups on myspace like military wives groups and they have shit like " support our convicts" "proud convicts wife" like really why the hell would you want to broadcast that shit... Anywho I am going to go more thoughts later!!

Hello!

Well This is just going to be my diary if you want to call it that. Im a 22 year old army wife and though its really hard at times its also really rewording. A little about me.... I am a college drop out (had nothing to do with my husband) I have dyslexia and a learning disability. I have red hair and freckles. My parents are divorced and have been for 20 some odd year and I wouldnt change that for the world. I have an amazing family who I love more than anything. I am really close with my family. I love my husband more than life its self. I am a good friend and a good listener. I try not to be quick to judge a person based on their looks or jobs. You never no whats happening in someones life and even if you have a similar life you will never understand what that person is going threw totally though you can sympathize and empathize. I wanted to be a mom and wife more anything and I got half of it done. After being a mom and wife I want to help kids Im not sure how yet I just know I have the passion and patients to help them. WELL thats all for now!!